Embracing fear is the key to invincibility

A couple of years ago, I almost lost everything. I lost my job and my home. My relationship ended. With that I lost “my” car, “my” status, “my” power, “my” source of money, “my” source of love and appreciation. I was as empty as someone can be. It was a very dark and painful period. But… it was so dark and so painful that it didn’t hurt at all! From there, the only way was up. The “little” I had left became so important, and so relevant and valuable. I had nothing to lose! With that feeling I was able to gather enough courage to start following my real dream. I was able to change my life completely. Now, my dream is my daily work. Now, every action I take is full of meaning, both for me and for the people I work with. Now, I was able to step above the writers block and write my manifesto. When I look back at those days of pure emptiness and profound fear I remember the words of Mark Twain: “I’m an old man and have known a great many troubles, but most of them never happened”. I decided to start my own business and give myself a break with the “looking for” Mr. Right. It was quite a daring thing to leave corporate life and start my own business in a very competitive arena. Would I make money? Would I be able to sell anything? It was quite daring to stop looking for Mr. Right. Would my partner exist? Would he find me? Now I am living the dream. All happened. I have a thriving business and the perfect partner. What was that gift that those days of fear gave me? I believe that fear itself was the gift. Being in the condition that I feared so much was so empowering, because, you know, it was not that bad! It was so empowering because your focus changes and you start valuing things that you previously believed were obvious. You start valuing things that you previously took for granted. You start seeing your strengths, your friends, your family, your skills… You start seeing your really valuable possessions. You don’t need to lose it all to feel invincible. You can have the experience in your mind. You can write your worst case scenarios. Do this exercise. Write in excruciating detail

• What would happen if you continue in this path of sameness: what would happen with you if you do not change anything
• What would happen if you choose for following your dream: what would happen if you take bold steps towards a new life

Contrasting both scenarios, you can see where your heart is. The worst case scenario of following your dream is always less dramatic than the scenario of sameness. That is where your heart is. This exercise will help you to realize that you can actually cope with the temporary discomfort that getting out of your comfort zone will imply. This temporary discomfort is always accompanied with many gems: helpers, discovery of your strengths, “miracles” and more. You know what you want. You don’t need to define your goal or your dream in detail. That you know. What you need to do is to embrace your fears, with every single detail. When you talk to them, when you listen to them, they will stop screaming at you. You will be in peace. You will be invincible.